Screwed up News...from Hogwarts
by Swim Freak
Summary: PG13 cuz its a story with hot and heavy snogging..nah PG13 cuz like people kiss and crap should be PG but what the heck...oh! co written by Tropicalfrost86!!!


Disclaimer: We don't own any of these characters and if we did..I'd be scared. They're J.K.'s characters, we just twist them to do our own evil biddings--not that we do that often..er..yea.  
Actually, we own both of the strange men. No only one ..I mean..yea..both.. *looks around* yea..  
  
Characters (listed in order of appearance): Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, strange man, Cho, other strange man   
  
Warning: This is scary stuff--I mean come on we wrote it!It could be triggering.  
Swim Angel: Triggering what?  
Tropicalfrost86:… *looks mysterious* Triggering…  
Swim Angel: Well… *smiles at people she can't see*   
Tropicalfrost86: So if we haven't scared you away yet, you can read the script now.  
Swim Angel: WAIT! If anyone actually does this like…with a video camera I want to know about it!! So like write it in the review…..or whatever…ok now you can read it.   
Tropicalfrost86: fine.  
Tropicalfrost86 + Swim Angel: have fun…try not to run from the room screaming. *evil grin*  
  
Hogwarts News  
  
Harry: Hello and welcome to Hogwarts News. The news show where I'm the boss! Hello…again I'm Harry Potter….duh! I mean check out the scar!!!   
  
Hermione: Harry! Get on with it!   
  
Harry: Right….well now for headlines!   
  
*Spiffy music*  
  
Harry: Today in potions Snape admitted to being gay!!! Not that it comes as a surprise to anyone….  
  
Hermione: Oh, Harry, we have some video footage. Here:  
  
*show scene of Snape in rainbow coloured shirt, waving a purple flag* "Look at me! I'm proud to be diverse.. Value and embrace diversity kids! Gay people aren't all bad: look at me!"  
  
Harry: Okay, I think that's enough. We did have to suffer through all of it in class you know.  
  
Ron: HAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! CAN WE SEE THAT AGAIN?!!?  
  
Hermione: NO! God Ron you're so….  
  
Ron: Hott? Sexy?   
  
Hermione: …not the words I was searching for…more like…  
  
Harry: Gay?  
  
Hermione: Thank you.  
  
Ron: Hey…  
  
Harry: Again! No surprise! So anyways…  
  
Hermione: Today I got the highest test grades in Arithmancy, and Charms, and-  
  
Ron: Today I found a slug on the bottom of my shoe.  
  
Harry: In REAL news…Cho and I are going out!! I love you Cho!!  
  
Hermione and Ron: *roll eyes*  
  
Hermione: *pulls out long list, scroll goes all the way to the floor* Since I figured we'd get off subject, I wrote a little list to help us stay on track..   
  
Harry: *sniggers* little?  
  
Ron: Hey don't be making fun of Hermione!! She's…opps…  
  
Harry: Aww!! That's sooooo cute *sings* Ron likes Hermione!!!  
  
Hermione: Oh grow up Harry.. *turns red*  
  
Harry: *makes kissing noises*  
  
Ron: Oh come on Cho's watching this you know…  
  
Harry: Oh! *looks all manly like* In other news, there was a giant squid spotting at the lake. Not that anyone really cares. Just to warn you, cuz I've heard he can be quite vicious sometimes.  
  
Hermione: *looks smug* Harry… Everyone knows that the giant squid  
  
Ron: HI MOM!  
  
Harry: *sniggers*…you do know that this is only broadcast at the school…  
  
Ron: oh…  
  
Hermione: Don't make fun of Ron! He's ….. uh….. *stops* *turns red*  
  
Harry: *laughs so hard he falls out of his chair* THIS IS TOO FUNNY!!!  
  
Ron: *looks at Hermione strangely*  
  
Hermione: *avoids eye contact with Ron*  
  
Harry: *still laughing*   
  
Hermione: *gives Harry dirty look*  
  
Harry: *stops laughing gets back onto seat* Also GRYFFINDOR BEAT SLYTHERIN IN QUIDDICH YESTERDAY!! We won by 800 points!!! WOO HOO!!  
  
Hermione: …yay…  
  
Ron: *still looking at Hermione strangely, but snaps out of it and smiles at camera*   
  
Hermione: Ron I l-…hate you!!!  
  
Ron: Well I l-…hate you too!!  
  
Ron and Hermione: *start snogging*  
  
*strange man walks across camera* He says: Hate is not so different from love.  
  
Harry: riiight…well I'm Harry Potter and that's news to me!  
  
Ron: *looks up*….yea….me too  
  
Hermione: and me!! *goes back to snogging Ron*  
  
Harry: …where's Cho?  
  
*Strange man walks back across screen, takes off overcoat and hat…* *is Cho*  
  
Cho: hey Harry.  
  
Harry: *blushes* Hi Cho..  
  
Cho: I hate you Harry Potter. *snogs Harry*  
  
Harry: Mmph. (aka: I hate you too) *continues to snog Cho*  
  
*Different man in overcoat walks by* He says: …..bye….. *walks away*  
  
*Both couples fall off seats onto floor so you can't see them*  
  
*Fade out*  
  
Swim Angel: *sniggers* Wasn't that great!!?!?  
Tropicalfrost86: stay tuned for our next script.. when ghetto girls go bad.  
Swim Angel: Starring Hermione, Cho, and Moaning Myrtle!! Oh and we need 10 reviews or no new script!!  
  
  
  
….so REVIEW US ALREADY! Thank you and come again! 


End file.
